I wasn't able to nurse Deklan, and it's a bummer for a few reasons. First, it's a cool way to bond with my new little one. Not being able to do it, there's a flip side to that- Zach has been able to feed him way more- and that has helped him bond with Dek, which is huge. I do bond with him feeding him his bottle, but it's not quite the same as nursing.
Obviously, breastmilk is way better for the baby than formula. I pumped for a little over three months. After that, it just was too much. I was stressed trying to get it all in. Pumping, feeding him (which takes so long), getting kids ready for school, dropping off and picking up kids from school, you know- all that stuff. I just didn't know how to fit it all in, and truly- even after stopping pumping, I still can't fit it all in. I guess that's the dilemma of a lifetime- you can't do it all.
I say this as a third reason I miss nursing, but if I'm being honest- it's right up there. Nursing helped me lose weight, and I really really want to lose weight! So that's a huge bummer. It's just going to take me longer this time to lose it. Not a bad thing- I'm just impatient.
In my desire to lose the weight, I've decided to start being more intentional about exercising. My grandma Bonnie got me a great double jogging stroller for my birthday, and I'm excited to start walking, and eventually jogging with it.
Then the other night, I decided that along with walking, I'd like to tone up somehow. So I did sit ups and girl push ups (where you are on your knees). I did those for three days, and I was so proud of myself! Well, yesterday I woke up with a lower back ache. Throughout the day, it got worse and worse. It was so bad that I could hardly walk- let alone stand up straight. Luckily, I was seeing my chiropractor yesterday afternoon, and he adjusted me. I could tell that it helped straighten things out, but it didn't make the soreness go away. Today is no better- I'm walking around like a 90 year old woman- it's bad.
I can't believe Zach has had this happen to him numerous times- so not fun. But on the brighter side, it's forced me to just be today. And if I were home with a back that felt good, I'd be moving all around the house taking care of the numerous things that are begging for my attention- ie: laundry, bills, the humungous pile of Deklan's clothes next to my bed that need to be sorted through,etc. But, since I can't do that, I've spent much of the day so far on the couch resting. With the kids playing around me with a movie on.Now Jett and Dane are napping and Deklan is laying under the Christmas tree looking at he lights. He's figured out that he can touch an ornament if he lifts his feet up- it's pretty cute.
Oh, I just don't know how so many people have to live with back pain. Won't it be awesome when we get to Heaven and have no issues with pain and have perfect bodies? Well, if we have bodies- I wonder what that will be like? Exciting to think about ...
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